Paraluman

  You will always be my 11:11 thought even if I am no longer yours… They say, when the numbers of the time are in unison, your guardian angel is closest to you – you must make your best wishes for it to come true. I believed in this as a child. As I see 11:11 on the clock, I tend to wish for my mom’s long life, for good health and the like. But as time passes by, I have met a lot of people that changed my perception on this. It is not the time in unison that makes your wishes do come true. It is not the only time your angel is closest to you. As a Christian, you are always close to God so as my faith in Him grows, my belief in 11:11 vanishes. However, there was someone who then again made me believe it was true; who made it special to me – special in a way that I waited for it most of the time. I yearned for it every day. It became my favorite time of the day… …not until he left. I was left in sorrow. I was left miserable. I was left in despair. I was left alone, again. A

  As the moon paints a ray of light on her face, she started wondering about her value - as a girl, as a lady, as a child and as a family. No one notices the pain beneath her laughter yet everyone sees her imperfections. She hardly believed that he'd see the stroke of misery in her life but no; it was a total disappointment. She thought she could share her burden to him yet he became her heaviest load. She thought he'd make a difference but he led her to a melancholic conclusion about herself. She thought it was a joyful roller coaster ride but it turned out to be a slow and sorrowful Ferris Wheel ride. But still, she chose to stay despite the darkness that encapsulated them. However, everything would always come to an end. She became weary trying to fix what's already broken. She lost her sunshine trying to stop the storm. She lost herself when she thought she's getting to know herself more. In the end, she was wounded. A new wound had made the old ones ache agai

  To Myself Whom I shared my      dreams with, Whom I lost through      the process, Whom I fought so hard      to pull together, Who almost drowned in       her chaotic mind, Who tried so hard to get       back up again, Whose life I'll try to       live again.